Work!

Follow the following persons on Twitter.. i promise you will NOT regret it. Russell Simmons and Rev Run... they Tweet non-stop, but its good stuff. I actually thought about canceling their tweets from my cell phone. I did not.. and I'm glad i didn't.

On January 4th @6:26am Rev Run tweets:Push reeeeal hard 2 feel good this week! ur outside just mirrors how you feel on the inside.
Same day @ 8:52am Rev Run tweets: Tr using God is gonna take sum faith! (playing it safe is probably one of the most unsafe things to do).

Same day@8:59am RevRun tweets: Sometimes u gotta go out on a limb, that's where all the fruit is.

I have been working under a manager who simply doesn't listen to me.. And yes, I am rough around the edges, there are things that I have not yet accomplished in my life. But, I have always done my work. I have been successful in all my implementations, which in turn bring in revenue to the company. However, it had gotten to the point where I was being ignored, no one is listening, and my responsibilities had taken a drastic turn downward.

I was unable to sleep, everyday i was going into the office, feeling like a shoe, bus, or train would drop on me.. I have NEVER felt this way before when it came to my career.. My personal life a different story.

@10:51am Rev Run tweets: Treat yourself right! I do anything for me!

At the office - Another shoe dropped. My employees who had been previously removed from me.. and onto another project outside of the IT arena were not provided any direction in their new roles. Work was building up, and they were going to support inbound calls (turning sys admins into call center agents).. I was asked my opinion (which is never heard, however i ALWAYS provided it just in case) Question: should they support the new contract 85% replacing the 35% that was lost? i suggested 50%. this way they/we can continue to support the current contracts. It was dismissed...

This was my last straw. the 150th time of dismissing my ideas.

@11:27am Rev Run tweets: Sometimes you need to just get away from it all, just b alone for a bit.

After the call, i felt small once again.. I'm so tired of feeling small. i sat still for 30 mins asking God, why me? what am I Rosslyn Adrian Ruffin the daughter of Wilfred and Gloria Ann Ruffin, mother of Aubrey Ruffin and Marty D. Coley jr.. parent to Shadow and Kobe.. doing wrong?? What.. 30 mins.. i spent victimizing myself, calling out my ancestors and living relatives.. just plain tired. it turned into a an hour..

I typed up a two sentence letter of resignation... and emailed it. My plan was to pack it up, move back home and finish school.. The Lord will help me figure the rest out, like paying for my children's education, eating..etc.. 20 mins after i sent it, it was accepted by my boss.. He FINALLY listened. (this is key) i forwarded the email off to two of my friends who had been coaching me to hold on. and, my mentor.

Of course i had cold chills going up my spine.. see i have NEVER REALLY relied on FAITH.. i talked about it, listened about, read about, sung about it... WOW! I was SCARED!

@1:49pm: Rev Run tweets: Sneak out on your current life and create a betta one b4 it finds out (shhh, just do it).

God will find a way to get through to you, i didn't move on those sleepless nights. i didn't budge. I just sat still. These tweets moved me to the core. I felt so dern good. i was happy. Still scared!

@2:41pm Rev. Run tweets: Go Fwd! Take 1 giant step! May I? yes you may!

i went to lunch, and while i was gone, problems happened.. now i haven't left the building for lunch in months.. and this was a late one.. I was called by my boss, asking me to clean up the mess that had been made.. I went back into the building. took care of the problem with my "team". Really scared!

Left for the day at 5:00pm sharp.. slept a little better, but not well.

January 5th

@5:02am Rev Run tweets: Don't look 4 approval @ work, ur work will praise you well! FOCUS.

Around 6am.. i receive a call from a friend, who i didn't inform... Saying "WTF, why did you quit, what is going on..i told you i was trying to work on something (we had been talking since thanksgiving) I said i understand that i have one month after my last day to return to LM without issue. My last day is January 18th. He said ill call you back..

7:45am his HR person called me i explained to her what happened.. long and short.. since i focused on the long above... I start work for the Chief Technology office on February 8th.. my belongings will be relocated on January 24th to Arrive in DC early Feburary. This was moving fast.... real fast.

BTW- my boss asked me to stay until February 1st. WOW! is he listening?? Oh and my other contracts want me to stay.. looks like I'm taking them with me.. because the CTO wants to help me get the support i need to get them to optimum productivity..

GOD is ALWAYS listening and guess who knows better..

lesson learned:

i will forever step out on faith.i will stop underachieving, i will go where i am needed, and believe in myself. Over the past 40 years i have had some very disturbing behavior.. you know...